More Cat Nutter stuff

This post is for Benjamin at The Deep Middle, who challenged me to write a poem about cats that attack their owners. His wife, he says, has a cat who scratches her all the time. When I read his comment, the old song, You Always Hurt The One You Love, popped into my mind and, annoyingly, refused to leave. (I've always loathed that song, it's such a dirge.)

I used to have a cat called Perdita who would lie in wait on the stairs for unwary victims, then attack their ankles. Perdita was a tiny, bony kitten with a ratlike tail when we first got her, but she grew into a huge fluffy tabby and the tail developed into an enormous banner of a thing. She looked a bit like a cross between a squirrel and a Maine coon. My daughter, who was quite small at the time, was terrified of her.

Benjamin posts the most wonderful poetry on his blog, which made the task of coming up with a piece of creative writing even more intimidating. To be fair, he did release me from any poetic obligation, but I feel a challenge is a challenge. So here's the poem. It's dedicated to all those (and there are many) whose cats reward their affection with actual bodily harm.

You always hurt the one you love
(With apologies to Allan Roberts and Doris Fisher)

You always hurt the one you love
Claws out! She’s stroking me, aim for her wrist

The one you shouldn't hurt at all
She thinks it’s a cry for attention

You always take the sweetest rose
But really it's a form of revenge
And crush it till the petals fall
Scratch and bite! That’ll teach her
You always break the kindest heart
To take a kitten whose only thought is survival
With a hasty word you can't recall
And burden it with all this affection
So if I broke your heart last night
Because some cats can’t handle love
It's because I love you most of all
A bit like humans, really